December 2009
3 posts
In Amongst The Millions.
Almost as to add insult to injury of a very long week, and overall, a very long year, Vic Chesnutt left us all tonight.
I won’t pretend to be the cool guy that has loved Vic’s music forever. Actually, the first time I listened to him was with his album ‘Left To His Own Devices.’ It felt mournful yet hopeful at once. One track in particular that really hit home on that...
Nothing Changes.
I’m pretty sure that to a certain extent, everyone is a tad protective of their exes. It doesn’t really matter how long you were together, it just happens.
Tonight I found out that one of my exes has been dating a friend. Normally, I wouldn’t have any concern with this. In fact, I would be quite happy for both parties. But this, this was something different.
How should one...
America's Next Top President
Sure, 2012 is still a few years away, but I think it’s high time we start planning for our next election now.
I’m sure everyone could agree that voting needs to be made more simple in this country, be it by e-mail, phone or some other modern technology. Well, I might have the solution.
The real way to get everyone out voting is to make it into a reality show!
Hear me out.
Instead...
November 2009
4 posts
Everybody Have Fun Tonight.
I was recently defriended on Facebook by someone I’ve known for years over an argument about the Beatles.
Let me explain.
First off, we need to establish the fact that you will always have a friend that obsesses over the Beatles. This is only one of the true facts of life besides the fact that you will get old and die. You might be able to avoid this until you are in your golden years,...
Blues For A Loathsome Princess.
In 45 minutes, Gretchen had to be at work. Usually by this time, she was what one could easily refer to as “bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.” But today, she couldn’t move. It was if someone had sucked the marrow of life from her.
So, she lay, motionless.
Suddenly, she realized she had 15 minutes to be to work. She sat up, and laughed about a lame joke she made in her head...
Best Of 2009, Part One.
My taste in music is not perfect. Nor is yours or anyone elses. We like different shit, and for different reasons. So as I write this list and you read it, keep in mind this is not to rub any sort of elitism in your face whatsoever. Simply put, these are records I have dug on this year, and the reasons I do said digging. Agree or disagree, it doesn’t matter, I like them, so there. Got that...
Rollie's.
It finally happened. Tonight, at Rollie’s. With my good friend Jeff at my side, I met Allie face to face. For those of you that don’t know, we started talking almost a month ago via Match.com. Yes, I realize that dating websites usually stink of desperation, and you would be right to think that. But for whatever reason, we started talking because of Match.com, and it continued from...
October 2009
6 posts
An Examination Of Eternal Damnation, or, "Help! ...
Tonight, for reasons unknown and unexplainable, I found myself drawn to going to Wal-Mart.
To clear things up, I never go to Wal-Mart. There is never a reason under the sun I need to be near a Wal-Mart. In fact, I hate Wal-mart. But, I could not help myself at this particular time. It was as if it was calling to me. It’s awful, incandescent lights were speaking to me, and I needed to...
Now That's What I Call An IdeaThought!
In the newest issue of Relevant magazine, (or, as I like to call it MODERN MANS GREATEST GIFT TO HISTORY,) there was a very typical “back to school” article. Now, nothing about the article itself caught my attention, it was the list that followed called “Still Bored?”
You can find that list here, as I would rather not retype it all. And while, of course, I give a hearty...
Look. We Shouldn't Have To Keep Going Over This. ...
I swear, I’m really not.
I know, I know. I always look like I am. But I swear to you, not stoned.
Sure, I might have some of the same characteristics of someone who is stoned, but that’s just shitty genes and unlucky heredity. I might be a bit overweight, rarely open my eyes beyond the level of slightly awake, but there are reasons for those.
For one, I’m fucking lazy,...
A Quick Memo To Daniel Kaproth Of Years Past.
Hey, buddy! Do you recognize me? No? It’s me, you!
I know, it’s probably a bit tough, well with the hair I’ve lost and the weight I’ve gained. But, rest assured, it’s me/you.
Well now, where to start? First off, stop going to the bar every night and stopping at Coborn’s on the way home. Trust me, you are going to be just fine without that bag of...
Hey Everyone! Free Cupcakes And Pussy!
Religion. For better or worse, everyone has their own take on it. I’m no exception. In fact, I’m pretty outspoken about my stance on it.
I was raised Catholic from the time I was born until I was confirmed in the Catholic church. The next day I let my parents know that I did, in fact, not believe in what I had taken part in. As far back as I can remember, I never had the fear of...
A Very Tenacious Rant.
Once in awhile, usually when I’m drunk, (not this time!) I feel like opening up to people. Let them know about what probably makes me tick, or in the very least be such a difficult shit. Well, for anyone that reads whatever it is I’m always babbling on about, tonight is your night.
First off. Why am I always so difficult? Well, really, I’m not. I love to pretend I’m...
September 2009
2 posts
It's Been A Hard Day's Hype.
Today is 9/9/09. Depending on who you are, this either meant you were stupid enough to believe that the world was going to end, or you were jazzed about something Beatles-related.
If you fall into the first category, let me apologize. We’re all still alive. Looks like you will have to wait until 2012, or whenever people think the world is going to end next.
Now, if you fall into the...
Hello, Please Shut The Fuck Up.
Hi there, countless masses of uninformed and ignorant fucks! Just dropping in to throw my two cents into your empty pockets. So, let me guess. You’re still up in arms about our President’s speech to the kids today, right? Alright. Stop it. Just, stop it. If you didn’t read it, or kept your shit-spawn home today so they wouldn’t have to hear what Dear Leader had to...